What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the whale cross the ocean? To reproduce as a way of life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the fat man do when someone told him he was fat? He kept eating, for he was deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Rigo your a stupid ass

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

So a man enters a local paper's pun contest. He enters ten puns in hopes that one of them would win. But unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How did the mexicans get to the United States of America? By plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue God makes things beautiful... What happened to you

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: wanna hear a racist joke? A: sure RB: You're pathetic!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Nicolas Cage

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops