Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

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Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

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they say that if you commit suicide, you have done nothing wrong. does that mean hitler did nothing wrong?

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Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

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Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

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What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

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Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

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What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

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Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

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A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

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How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

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What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? My wife didn't cheat on me in a pile of dead babies.

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Your mom is so fat...

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What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have difficulty understanding each other.

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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A black man walks into a store and buys something.

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What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

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how hight is a china man ? derr his name is how high and he is a china man

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what did the women say when she found out that superman was clark kent. i know that you are superman clark kent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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