What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

how come so many people die every year due to starvation? They don't have enough food and there aren't nearly enough spider monkeys in North America.

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

Knock, knock. *answers door*

A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to end the lives of two male individuals and paralyze the the third male individual from the hip down.

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

Why do Eskimos build igloos? Because it is the most practical form of habitation for their climate zone, lifestyle, and availability of materials.

A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

What a gay guy get on his IQ test? 69

A black man, an arabic man, and a hispanic man are all in a car, who is driving? The black man.

I was going to tell a Holocaust joke, but I Jews not to. Anne Frankly, it's disrespectful. I'm sure you did Nazi that Hitlerious anti-joke coming.

Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

A man walks into a bar. Dyslexia is not funny. -Tag

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

Why can't Billy ride a bike? Because he's a fish

So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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