Chuck Norris is an average human being!

What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

How many dead babies can you fit in a drawer? 10 25* *if you use a blender

A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

Why did the man rob a convenience store? Don't ask why, call the police! He could be robbing more stores!

What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

What's worse than having AIDS. Being Black.

What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

Nippies

what is sticky and brown?a stick

A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

what's bad about pushing your friend off a cliff? you can't do it twice

what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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