What do you call a bear with no fur? A taco.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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Why did the mother cross the road? To find her dead baby that was hit the night before.

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What has four legs and one arm? An attack dog in a daycare.

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What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

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Once upon the time.... It was 12 o´clock

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A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

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give me thumbs up or i'll rape u to death

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What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

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why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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Q: what do you call a drunk blond? A: a cab

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A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

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What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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Why was the young black boy kicked out of his classroom? Because the manner of his actions were inexcusable.

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i have yougurt with tractor

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

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A blonde and a brunette are falling from a cliff. They are going to die.

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How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops