What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

Hi

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

What's worse than finding a pickle in a jar? Finding Snooki in a jar.

A man walks outside and walks back in. Why? Because it was raining purple unicorns and he felt the need to go back inside.

What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

So what makes you that much adaptable? I get the feeling I should get this by now.

Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Penis!

What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

Why did Hitler kill the Jews? He didn't, the people he told to kill them did.

What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...