Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

What did the disabled boy get on Christmas morning? Cancer.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

What do you get when you cross an orangatang with a grizzly bear? Nothing, they just walk past each other unless the bear eats the shit out of the monkey then feeds it to her cubs

#Hanging Degus

How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

mark is mark

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting raped mercilessly by Ronald McDonald.

Why did you insult me and then punch me in the face? The hell if you care anymore, I killed you straight after. Neo-Nero. (Rest in peace Nero7 better known as The Moral Man, I hope I can one day live up to your greatness.) Moral: "Keep your spirits up, we are all going to die sometime, but life means nothing if we lose faith in ourselves and each other" Moral 2: "Nero Septimus, that will be my first and last moral that made a figment of fucking sense, if you are watching from whatever comes from life, I know that this is what you would have done, but just so you know and always wanted for us that followed you, I am doing this for my own goddamn fucking self, respects... Now if your ghost is still watching, get the fuck out of my room you damn cripple, and know that your arm is somewhere in the basement because its so goddamn bad ass that it fucking freaks me out, and so fucking heavy that I think you where some sort of superhuman, now gtfo, as you taught us, we cant focus on the goddamn afterlife, if we are gonna get the best out of life and the present, adios amigo"

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

Why did the quick brown fox jump in the lake? He did not see lake on the other side of the lazy dog.

Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

what do you call a gay guy Ej

Knock, knock No, I do not want to hear about God.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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