Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because the light said don't walk

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wombat monkey juice.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

If a tree falls on a cat in the woods, does it make a sound? Yes and no, the tree falling makes a loud noise, but the cat under it is instantly killed, preventing any sound that would of been made by the now crushed feline.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops