What causes floods? Too much water.

How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

Woman's rights.

what makes reed stop talking? LYRENS SHARPENED PENCIL

Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

What did the cast of sex and the city get for Christmas Nothing Sarah Jessica Parker is Jewish

A man walks into a crowded bar and orders a beer. The bartender doesn't hear him due to the background noise of everyone talking and the man has to repeat his order.

I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

I got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen.

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

Whats funnier than a Dead Baby in a bathtub? Nothing Thats as good as it gets!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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