how do you kill a little girl? seeing as murder is a federal offence i will not tell you how. you should be ashamed for asking.

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A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

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What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

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It's only racist if you consider them people.

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what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I bought a Jeep

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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What's worse than being a ginger? Being a soulless ginger

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What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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A pedophile walks into a daycare

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Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

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What do you call a feline attempting surgery? A catastrophe, because they aren't very good surgeons.

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Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

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What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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womens rights to vote

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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What did the boy find on his laptop? -Nothing, he comes from a broken home and can't afford one.

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Why did the man throw the woman off the cliffe? Tequilla.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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