If shoes could talk they'd tell you that they are not willing support your weight & floors are extremely dirty.

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What happened when the man stuck his hand in the blender? Nothing, it was turned off.

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. (Don't ask me how that's possible, just go with it) As the bartender is pouring it, he asks "Why the long face?" The horse responds "My son died of cancer this morning..."

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roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

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What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

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Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

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what are the three types of rings? -wedding ring -engagement ring -suffering

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chuck norris

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How do you survive the plague? you dont.

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

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A genie came out of a lamp explain?

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Mike tyson

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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