Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

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what do you call a black man on tv? an actor

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Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

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a man walks into a bar he got hurt

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *smiles* Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust ascending from hell.

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he's a pussy.

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What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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What did the 4 year old black kid ask his father for Christmas? A yo-yo. nah im just kidding he doesnt know who his father is.

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What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

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whats a dick a dick

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Q: What do you call a dog after the dentist? A: A dog.

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How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

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What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

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Dylan is a person

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? His health was dwindling ever since he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer several years ago and this looked like the end.

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What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

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I had my period 3 days ago.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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why the woman scream when she arrived at her surprise party? Everyone was dead!

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There is a black guy, British guy, and a Spanish guy in a room. Wait that'll never happen, black people hate Spanish people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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