Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

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I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

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-Knock Knock -Come in!

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Why am I righting in english? Because this is an english site.

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What do you call a bunch of white people running down a hill? Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? Mud slide What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill? Jailbreak

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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Wanna hear a joke? Justin bieber

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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Womens rights.

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What happens when you throw a green stone into the red sea? It gets wet.

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So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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Q: Why did the boy go to the orphanage? A: His parents were dead.

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"I like my women like I like my coffee, in a cup." -Paul Alangadan

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Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

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Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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