What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

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Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

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shammmm is a lesbian.

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what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

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How do you get 10 babies out of a blender? Potato Chips! Stupid!!!!

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You know what really pisses me off? When I drink too much coffee.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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justin bieber

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Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

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Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

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Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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69

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Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

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What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

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Your all fags

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Potassium? K.

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A man walks into a bar and starts telling anti-jokes to his friend. His friend is a follower and laughs even though they aren't funny.

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Why did the audience laugh at Chaz Bono? Because he told a funny joke.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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