whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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If life gives you lemons, Eat them.

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How do you get 10 babies out of a blender? Potato Chips! Stupid!!!!

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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You know what really pisses me off? When I drink too much coffee.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

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Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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69

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A mother and her kid are in a park: Kid: Why did the chicken go to jail? Mother: Because the chicken killed your father... Now we are broke living in a park and I'm gonna kill myself at noon, and so are you. Kid: I'm not doing that, and neither are you and Daddies over their! The dad is a zombie, this is the beginning of the zombie apocalypses. THE END!!! PUPPIES!!!!!!!!!

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Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

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What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a white guy They both have different skin color

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Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

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justin bieber

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

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Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

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Your all fags

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Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

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Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?" Brunette: "I don’t know." Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!"

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A man walks into a bar and starts telling anti-jokes to his friend. His friend is a follower and laughs even though they aren't funny.

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Potassium? K.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops