what's bad about pushing your friend off a cliff? you can't do it twice

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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yo mama is so fat even dora cant explore her

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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Wanna hear a joke? The WNBA

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Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

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What do you call a gay Mexican guy who is deaf, has no arms, no legs, and is bald? Whatever his name is.

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What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

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Q: Why were the chicken and the cow friends? A: Because they shared common interests.

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why did Sally fall of the swing....she had no arms. knock knock who's there? NOT Sally.....

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Clever rhyming punch line refrigerator

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

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A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

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You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

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Black History Month

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What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

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what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops