"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

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2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

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A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

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Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

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Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

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A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

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The bear woke up after his long hibernation of the winter. "Boy, am I hungry!" The bear wandered around and ate some berries. "These blackberries are too bitter and unripe for my taste, I'll go eat something else." He stumbled upon a honeybee hive and took some honey out and ate it. He was swarmed and stung by many of those bees. "That wasn't my favorite batch of honey, I'm still pretty hungry, let me go find some other food. He came across a cabin in the woods. "There maybe some food in there." To some, this was known as the Northern Vermont Massacre. It was a tragic happening. The 7 membered family, the Hernandez family, all died that day. The bear chase all of the adult and children and the house and brutally ate them.

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what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

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Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

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What do you call someone with no legs nor arms? Mat

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

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im black

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

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Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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