Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

What's worse than a bad anti-joke? A bad anti-joke about Skyrim What's worse than a bad anti-joke about Skyrim? The Holocaust

Knock Knock Who's there? the mailman.

There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

religion.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a pleasant evening as they talk to each other about their day over a relaxing drink.

What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

Roses are yellow Violets are also yellow Please don't stereotype again

Sometimes when you drink sperm you choke

Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

A man walks up to another man and asks what time it is. He then replies " It's 2:00" The man then pulls out a sandwich and eats it

what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Wombat monkey juice.

justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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