want a balloon? yeah

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i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

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An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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69

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What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

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Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

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Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

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That's not what she said.

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Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

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Where did Ann go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra!

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

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how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

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Q. What is a brown cow called? A. A cow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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