A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

What is the difference between a dead baby in a blender and a rock? There are many differences. One of them is the fact that I don't masturbate to a rock.

Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted of in space.

Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

yo mama's so fat her stomach mass weighs more than people who dont have as much fat as her.

why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

Nippies

What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

A redhead walks into a hairdressing salon and asks to have her hair dyed black due to being a subject of bullying and social rudeness.

Why aren't 4 black people driving a red mustang? They can't afford it.

your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

- I'm in my mum's car, broom broom. - Get out me car. - Aw.

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

Why did the pedophil go to church? To rape small children.

4-4-2

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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