Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

What is the greatest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

Gary: Hey Bill, wanna hear a joke? Bill: Yes Gary: Okay.

What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

Why do Iraqi women never sleep with American soldiers? Because Americans always talk about pulling out but they never do!

What has wings and can't fly? What has legs and can't move? What has mouth and can't eat? A dead bird on the road

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

You know what is not cool? Fire.

you and your family will die tonight

A guy walks into a bar. Yep.. that's it.

What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

your mammas so poor she is probably going die in a few days of starvation

There were 4 black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff. The sad thing was it was a nice car.

Why does the party start when Kesha walks in? Well, it's Kesha's party and it would be rude to be in her house having a party when she wasn't there.

Pokemon go: Team mystic

Why is 6 scared of 9? Selena Gomez

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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