Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

What did the Bishop say to the pebble? Wash my car

How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

A tree walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the log face?".

What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender.

Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

What do you call a tree with no branches? A stick.

knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

how do you kill a little girl? seeing as murder is a federal offence i will not tell you how. you should be ashamed for asking.

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *smiles* Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust ascending from hell.

A black man, a white man and a Mexican are in a car... Who is driving... A police man

What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

I had my period 3 days ago.

what did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing because they were both baked at 500 degrees and died

Hey i just met you and this is crazy i suck at rhyming door knob

you just contradicted yourself.

Sophie Cameron is Gay

What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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