Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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Why? Whats wrong?

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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womens rights

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Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

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Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

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Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

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Whats worse than a dead whore? 9/11

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

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So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

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What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

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what does gum eat ? gum you idiot!

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What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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