- Anti Joke

thumbs up!

If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

Dissing the bible just 4 lols: Relax chill edition. -First, I have "crossed" the gaza desert ok? It took me seven minutes walking SLOWLY, yet with God as a guide Moses took 40 years? WHY? The desert was generally smaller then! -Eat my body and drink my blood and thy shall live eternally, I admit that eating well such as bread and a bit of wine daily is good for ya, thanks jebus points for you. But is eternity a number in the bible? Or does eating just bread and alcoholic wine truly grant one immortality? Nope sorry impossible. Buuuuuut, if a piece of Jesus brought immortality, then its canibalism, and the bible is meant to be followed to the letter, not symbolically. -Thy shall not steal: Jesus "borrowed" donkeys at random, his peeps asked but isnt that wrong? Jesus answered the lord shall give them a donkey anew. (so give me your car, God shall bring you another, you wont claim your little lord stole and lied huh? -Jesus murdered some tree because it gave him no fruit, you know at wintertime where trees do not bear fruit? Thy shall not kill unless thy are Jesus? -God: Drowned almost all= Worst serial killer ever? -Why do churches "the house of God" need money constantly? Is God that poor? -Only those that hate their mother and father might follow Jesus? While only those that love thieir parents can follow God? Well okay "new" testament is some sort of update like windows I get that... Kinda. .-When Jesus shouted "Father/Lord WHY!" while agonizing on the cross God answered with a lightning bolt? What kinda trucking answer is that? Poor poor Jebus. :( -God makes no mistakes, he just regrets creating humanity his greatest mistake? :( -God had existed forever right? One day he said let there be light, so he spent eternities in total and complete darkness? Aww man! -Why Is Satan the antichrist, he offered Jesus water at the desert, humans crucified tortured and killed him, talk about tossing blame the wrong way. -Humanity created Sin, God had to murder his own son in order to break Sin, do humans have power over God via Sin? -Jesus died in order to prove his immortality, okay, but why all the torture? What did that do? -At one battle the army was led by God holding a sword himself, but they had to retreat once they reached the mountains because the enemy carriages where plated with steel? God lost against steel? Ok Ok... -Jesus said on the cross that he would return, three days later he did, you waiting for his third coming? -The bible was changed by priests for the last time (for now) roughly hundred and fifthy years ago by priests? Why? Priest are to serve God, not to use his power for their own, fuck priest... -God clearly states that one shall not put any God before him, is he admitting that there are others, or that we can believe in others too as long as we dont allow our fait in them to surpass his? -Why is God a jealous God? Why do we follow a dude whose intentions "are shrouded in mystery?" How can THAT be the answer we seek? -Love thy neighbor: Which one? (lol). -Enough for now, except "eat only four legged animals such as the lobster (which has at least six legs, lol)

Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

lol

What do you call two dead blondes? A terrible day for their families and for many more to come

your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

What's black and blue and red all over? I don't know, that's why I was asking you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

Why did the teacher yell at her students? The class was acting completely inappropriate and she felt it was necessary to discipline them so the current situation won’t repeat its self.

A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

What do you call a black man who has become a millionare? A financhaly successful buisnessman who worked hard to be where he is today.

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. They both start to pee, and the white man looks over to the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the blackman's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels embaraased at his latent homosexuality. They both leave, never seeing eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

What do you call a homosexual in the army? A brave and honorable person who should be applauded for their service to this great nation

Go online. why? To get a quote. why? To save money. Because we said so! Parenting can be hard. see how easy it is to save with GEICO.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

How do you avoid dying? You can't everything dies.

Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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