A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

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why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because her dad through a fridge at her

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Why did Ramsey fall off the seesaw? Because while he was playing with friends on a seesaw at a nearby Country Club, a very angry and insane man who had many handicaps, decided to solve his problems by killing someone. A funeral was held a week later.

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

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A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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girls lacrosse

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what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

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What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

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whats worse than your computer crashing? your plane crashing...twice

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

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What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

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Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops