Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you do with dead chemists? You carefully place their remnants in a casket, which is to be placed in a precisely dug hole. Once the casket is placed, you put a gravestone into the ground, signifying the chemists' date of birth and death.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my legs cramped

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats worse than a dead whore? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why? Whats wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

thumb_up thumb_down +20

guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

this website is the funniest thing i've ever seen, besides everything i've seen that's funnier than it

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An Irishman walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Welcome to die!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops