Bird jokes are not funny! Crow up!

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

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If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

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If a tree falls in the forest does a woman hear it? Probably, but the real question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

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What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

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How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

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What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

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Unless you yourself put you trough that pain and misery, you have no reason to dislike or flee from who you are.

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

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What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Murder me once, shame on you.

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A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are green I'm bipolar

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sun is bright.

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops