What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

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why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

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why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

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Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

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Why did the jew die Really...

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Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

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what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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What did the man say to the really attractive woman? We are different genders

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

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What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to order a couple drinks, and shortly leaves after drinking them, later ending up in a fatal car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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