roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

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why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

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maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

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A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

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A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

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Do u liek mudkipz GO TROLLING

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Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

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im black

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Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump!

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What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Kim Jong Il? Hitler's German

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Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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