What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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if life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians

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watashi no namae wa ramune desu

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I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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what worse than a worm in your apple being kidnapped by hores and eaten alive by rabbits

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What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

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What did the famed say when he lost his tractor I lost my tractor!!!!

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Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

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yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

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A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

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Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? We both have hair

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what's difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

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What's black and white and red all over? Colors

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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Q: What did the guy with glasses say to the guy without glasses? A: Dude your not wearing glasses.

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Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

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Why did the boy like watching NASCAR? He didnt because he was a fish and a secret Soviet spy

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As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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