Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

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Single man, interested in women. Profession: Particle Physicist. Looking for: A strong interaction with a strange, charming woman. One who will ride both up and down the roller-coaster of a relationship, that is not fussy about being top or bottom and that is not impartial to the many flavours of life. I look forward to you spinning me around; Yours Sub-atomically, Professor Quark.

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Roses are black Violets are too I am a dog I don't know how to rhyme

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

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What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

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Do you want to French kiss? What are you, racist

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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nina...;shut up we are having fun :)

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How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

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What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Where do you live? In a house

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Why is Roenz Gay? He isnt.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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Yo mama is so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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I was born.

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What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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