How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

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a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the face like yours belongs to the zoo. Please don't be sad, 'cos I'll be there too.. Not in the cage but laughing at you!

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whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

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You've heard of take your child to work day, but I bet you haven't heard of 9/11- take your plane to work day

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Why did the black man kill his girlfriend? Because it was his mom!

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Guess what? The Game.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

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42

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

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Why did the man laugh when he saw someone using a shake weight? He remembered Dane Cook's stand up preformance from the night before.

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4 strangers are shopping at the mall. The big one does a trick and then the small one was good. The bad was small like a tree, seven days later the short one was having a party with a pretty lady. To the teacher was morning and everyone did happy times.

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what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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Hey! Where is my tracker?

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Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

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men, men like men= men+bed

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What is harder than Jenga? Being a quadraplegic.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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What has 4 eyes and can't see. Blind siamese twins!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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