Let's go burn down an orphanage, what are they gonna do tell their parents?

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Yo mama is so hot that she needed to lower the temperature

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If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Do u liek mudkipz GO TROLLING

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Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

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Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

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A black man, a Mexican man, and an Asian man all walked into a bar. They proceeded to have a good time together as they were celebrating their graduation from medical school.

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fack me in the ace! CC

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

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Penal Dysfunction

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What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

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Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

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It was nice knowing you Erron, it really was.

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What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

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What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

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Why was the dog crying? Because his owners hated him and called him stupid.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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How could the teacher tell that the student was dead? logic

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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