Three Jews walk into a bar. One says something to the other two, but it was in Yiddish, and I don't speak that, so I don't know what he said, but all of them laughed really hard, so it must have been funny.

Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems show me your boobs

This sentence is false.

Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

Why is Dominic's nick name big D? Because the first letter in his name is D.

What worse than rain Osama Bin Laden

Why can't Helen Keller hear or talk straight? Because she's dead

Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

My name is actually Nero by the way, or Neron, which means black, have you ever played Mortal Kombat? There is a character there Named Erron Black, which is a total pun on that, there is also a character named Boraicho which drinks constantly while Borracho means drunkard in Spanish so yeah, Erron Black is simply an anagram for Nero Black, or rather Neron Black... Anyway, now that we got your brain nice and confused, I can increase the effect with OVER NINE THOUSAND! So your pictures "remastered" on photoshop or something?

Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

Your Mom.

What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to order a couple drinks, and shortly leaves after drinking them, later ending up in a fatal car accident.

What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

Joe used to always talk about his family and his two wonderful kids Joe can no longer talk to or about his family because his smoking habits have gotten out of control

Yo sugars so salty when you put it on your french fries they taste like salty french fries

How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

why did one crayon give another crayon the silent treatment? because they are crayons, unable to speak

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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