Why can't the cheetah run fast anymore? Because it died in a forest fire.

A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

A: Knock Knock B: ...

Why didn't the girl make the basketball team? She has no arms or legs.

You've heard of take your child to work day, but I bet you haven't heard of 9/11- take your plane to work day

Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

Bake until golden at 375

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

What do you call a hobo that lives a in a box. A hobo

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

SINCE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY READING THIS, IT WILL GET THE MOST LIKES!!!!!

What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

How does one peel a potato? First I would suggest going to your local grocery store, and purchasing a vegetable peeler (although, in fact, the potato is not considered a vegetable). Once at home, I recommend disinfecting it of germs. Unless you already own a vegetable peeler, in which case I would simply peel the potato as every normal human would.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...