A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his tricycle? He was run over by a bus.

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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What's black and white and red all over it? Not a newspaper because red is not all over it. Answers to this question may vary.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican, a black guy and an octopus? I don't know but I don't like it.

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What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

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Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

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Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

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What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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Why is Cindy crying? She got a branch stuck in her eye which irritated her sensitive cornea so her tear duct produced a tear to help shed the material from her eye.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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Old guitars sound like cat's guts

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting ran over by a truck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

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why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

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Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

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Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their firstborn child.

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Why is jim gay? because he likes men

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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guess what? chicken butt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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