What's the difference between dogs and humans? 8.

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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What did John the accountant do when he saw a flying dog, He woke up from a wonderful dream and started his day

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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vagina, hehehehehehehe

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want a balloon? yeah

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A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

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Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

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Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What's black and white and red allover and can't fit through the door? A nun with a spear through her neck

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Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

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whats the difference between a white kid a nd a puerto rican kid? one smells fine and the other one smells like he walked out of a butcher shop that sells cigars and cheap prostitutes

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Why did the potato commit suicide? Forget that. Why was the potato alive in the first place?

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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Women's rights.

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

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what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

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Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

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Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

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Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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