Why did the crack head cross the road? To get crack.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

What goes up and does not come down? Why the hell ask me.

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

Why did the girl jump of the control tower??? She didnt I lied.

Hitler said "Jew mad?" I did nazi that coming !

Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

Q: What did the alcoholic get for his Birthday?\ A: A Jail Sentence

Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

What's the difference between a live baby and a dead baby? A dead baby doesn't cry.

What's the difference between a catcher's mitt and Lou Ferrigno? If you seriously said "I don't know, what?" I suggest getting a medical examination by a professional psychologist.

Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

Who lost World War II? The Jews.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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