knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

What did the engineer say to the supervisor? Hi.

Proof reading

What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

a boy named justin littleton made his own anti-joke......

What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

Robin, get in the batmobile.

What really puts a kick into both my life and the lives of others around me? My leg(s) of which recieves messages from a sophisticated bundle of "wires" in my cranium that enables it to act at all.

What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

The only time your mother was ever considered "hot" was at her cremation.

vbh

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he didn't have the guts.

It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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