What do you call putting a vehicle on the side of the road? Parking.

When life gives you lemons, You find a new life

What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

Knock Knock Who's there? No one. You're imagining things.

A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

I advise you, don't mess with me, I know karate, kung fu,judo, tae kwon do, jujitsu, and 28 other dangerous words.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Salesmen. Does this smell like chloroform to you?

What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

26 because if 25 is funnier than 24, 26 should be even funnier right?

No.

whats dead and gone your nanas cat

whats woorse then being stupid? kaelynn... aka big head

Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream all night? Cot death.

Why is Kyle so gay. Nobody knows

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have narcolepsy.

u know y blondes and tornadoes r so alike? first theres a lot of blowing and sucking, and then u lose ur house!

why did the man tell a joke? to make people laugh

Your mama's so fat.... I ran around her twice, And got lost

So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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