Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

A walrus walks into a bar

Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

What is the best part about football The scoring

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Why couldn't the man walk? Because his leg is broken.

How many hearts does a jellyfish have? None.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

Why'd the girl fall of her scooter? She fell into a hole and died. She was never found again. All that was left was her scooter.

Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

You're mum is so fat, she has low self-esteem

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a rapist.

Why did the orange fall asleep? Because its never awake.

Stewie: MOM! MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! Lois: WHAT!!! Stewie: Hi, hehehehehehe. Family Guy -Louis

A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

If life throws you melons... ouch

Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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