Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

A chickens walks into a bar... And greets her fellow friends

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. They both start to pee, and the white man looks over to the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the blackman's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels embaraased at his latent homosexuality. They both leave, never seeing eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

The Mexican word of the day is JUICY. Tell me if juicy see the cops.

Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

Why did the black guy only turn left? Because he was mentally retarded and couldn't tell left from right and had no idea where he was going

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

Q: How do all 5 gay guys walk? A: In One Direction

Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom went to the doctor and found out she has cancer, so when she told me, I was eccentric. That tree is green.

Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

What's black and blue and red all over? I don't know, that's why I was asking you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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