What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

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What's another word for a priest? Rapist

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Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

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How do you make a clown sad? You hit him in the face with axe

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What is black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Not black berries because black berries come from a bush.

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What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

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What's worse than a needle in a hay stack? A needle in a stack of drug addicts.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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A family's house was possessed by ghosts causing them great fear and discomfort. Who are they gonna call? A real estate agent.

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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Why was the baby ant confused? Because his uncles were ants

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

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I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

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Jews

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How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

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What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

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a blind man walks across a road. he's dead

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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obama leadership

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Your mother is so old that she is dead.

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Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

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what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops