Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

Some people like melon and others like soup.

Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The black guy because the Mexicans was recently aressted for a dwi and had his repealed. But lately he has worked towards cleaning his life up. They were actually driving to an AA meeting.

whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

Do you know what's not right? Left.

Why doesn't Santa Claus give presents to African children? Because Santa Claus isn't real.

How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

What did the man say to the really attractive woman? We are different genders

Sac

Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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