What's black and blue and red all over? A baby right after I kill it

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does a black man do when he breaks into a car? He steals the radio

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The WNBA.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black man in a truck A driver

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you call a dead black man? dead

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

BBC have a new porn channel. C Boobies...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Mary had a little lamb... that's what she gets for having intercourse with the farm animals.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops