People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

Obamacare haters

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back. And 6 million in the ashtray

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

What did the avocado say to the person? I can't talk

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

your father died

Seth stock has a large penis

Knock Knock. Who's there. To. To who. To whom.

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

Why was the baby crying? Because you repeatly hit it in the face with a brick, you sick freak.

A tree walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the log face?".

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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