A buissnes man walks into a meeting and says hello i'm a buissnesman

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Why do you go to a black mans yardsale? To buy something cheap. Why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because it is illegal.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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Horton Hears... Rape and violence and doesn't do anything about it.

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A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

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What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

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Q. Why did the rooster switch on the TV? A. Just for some hentertainment!

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How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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Matt is not funny.

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Knock, Knock. Come In.

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Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

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Whats worse that a rhino hitting you in the face? A rhino with horns hitting you in the face

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What did one llama say to the other llama when they were on vacation? I filled our luggage with orphan meat because i'm building a meat dragon and not just any meat will do.

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS UPS who? UPS, your package is here.

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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What is cold? Winter

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Dear Chase. You are retarded Your jokes suck Violets are red jump off a bridge

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What happens when you stab yourself in the heart? You die.

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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