Q:why did the boy fall off the swing A:he had no arms Q:why couldn't he get up A:he had no legs Q:why did he die A:he fell in a puddle

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Scenario: Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub The first one says, "Hey, can you pass the radio please" And the second one replies, "Sorry, my cousins are made of soap."

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What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

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What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

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Why are their so many lesbians? cause they LOVE the pussy.. (Tastes soo wet and tight)

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

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A guy orders soup at the resturant and says to the waiter, "will you try this soup?" The waiter says "what is it too hot?" the guy says "just try the soup." the waiter asks "Is it too cold?" the guy sais just try the soup." the waiter says "fine, where's the spoon?" AHAHHH!!!

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

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Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

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People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

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How much Cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? A lot!

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why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

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What's big and red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater!

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Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

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What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

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What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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fack me in the ace! CC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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