A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

what did the police do when they saw an arab running towards a building? Watched him run by because he was probably late for something

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

What do you call a black man that robs a bank? A bank robber

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your penis tastes like shit.

Michael Brown

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

Ching Chong Chinaman is sitting on a wall. People make fun of his name because it is so unusual.

Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

Why did the man not open his door to the trick or treaters? He was a sex offender and it was illegal for him to open it...

Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

What did the man say when he lost all his hair? Man: My life has been getting worse and worse ever since I developed cancer.

What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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