How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the blonde say to the brunette? We both have hair

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy like watching NASCAR? He didnt because he was a fish and a secret Soviet spy

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Wanna know who doesnt no how to right a joke? Who ever wrote this...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you get an asian out of a rice field? Napalm.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Dogs in my home.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Busted? What the hell is going on?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

thumb_up thumb_down +5

a ginger has a soul

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two english guys meet at work

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's brown and sticky? 'Brown' is a colour, and 'sticky' is a consistency. Please try and use correct grammar.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops