A guy in a truck delivering furniture runs over a frog. Concerned for the frog, he pulls over and runs back to the frog and asks "Are you ok?" The frog replies "Yeah, you want to buy a cupboard?"

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

This is a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +47

what happens when a Texan see's a black guy? he says howdy

thumb_up thumb_down +45

There is a Mexican and a Black guy in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican, you racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Yes!

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's Brown and Sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Like if you like big tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

thumb_up thumb_down +39

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

thumb_up thumb_down +39

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops